My Haze Contrast Photos

In the first set taken at Parkland Green during the haze (psi in the 80’s) vs a relatively pollution free day some months ago (psi in the 20’s I think?), the contrast seems great.

Actually in the second set the psi was much worse (on the roads), even hazardous at about 187. I could feel the discomfort in my throat even with the protection of the car aircondition filters. It feels like being in a room with 10 smokers. You can see how visibility is reduced by the smog. 

Lest we forget what our pre haze blue sky days look like, I thought a side by side comparison was much needed. I’m definitely going to appreciate the skies even more when hopefully monsoon season comes and clears the haze away by December. But please let us experience this earlier in November.  

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Sometimes I Make Myself Cringe

I haven’t written in a long while and cringe as I spot grammatical errors (typos or the result of the darn autocorrect function on my iPhone) I’ve made and my juvenile writing style. 

Most of all, I disappoint myself with my self censorship. On some level it disgusts me. Yes I disgust myself with my cowardice. But if like me, you’ve lived here long enough you know there’s no such thing as true freedom of speech and I’m not brave, intelligent or self-sacrificing enough to be a hero. (But we do have some courageous souls out there.) 

I have enough anxieties coping with life as it is. I’m hardly above sea level some days and I just don’t have the mental strength. Yes I know it sounds selfish. It is. Totally. I think I’m writing this as an apology of sorts. Maybe to myself as well. I feel a need to explain myself and a writing style which is always holding back when I broach certain topics. 

Most are all right with this and they see it as a trade off for material well being, economic prosperity and security. Or they are too busy with work to think about anything else. 

But I truly hope that one day our society will mature and we won’t have to think so much about what we can or cannot write about. The waters feel murky and I am clueless about the boundaries. 

Being able to express myself freely is a very basic need for me and I hope things change so that the next generation won’t feel as oppressed as I do, even if I don’t live to see the change. 

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Plagued by the Haze

This haze seems never ending and highly frustrating (infuriating even if you think about how it’s affecting the health of the very young, the elderly and chronically ill). If your loved one’s health is adversely affected by the pollution (if they have heart or respiratory problems) then it’s downright criminal and not a light hearted matter in the least, if you think about it. Especially as it seems to have become a yearly occurrence and we’re told by Indonesian leaders it will take another three years to resolve.

I wish tourists who come here for the first time could experience Singapore with her usually good air quality. How unfortunate, the timing of their visit. I want the island to be seen at her best as I’m sure you do as well.

I’ve even noticed more birds on the ground rather than in the air, and looking sluggish. They don’t have a place to hide. 

I’ve been taking photos to remind myself not to take our usually clean air for granted. Added a photo from July, before the fires in Indonesia clouded our skies. The blue against grey – a stark contrast.

There is a silver lining though (just so that we won’t be labelled as constant complainers). With the sun’s rays blocked out, it isn’t as hot as it used to be. And pictures of the sun through the smog as a tiny round orange ball looks pretty cool. But seriously, no thanks, haze, (rooted in corruption), so detrimental to our health and confining us indoors. Please go away never to return. I’m sure ordinary people in Indonesia, Malaysia, Thailand and the Philippines wish for the same. 

Also for us to make more informed choices (boycott), I wish there was an official list of paper and palm oil products that have been found to have links to the illegal burning. At least then we wouldn’t feel as helpless as we do now. There is some power that we can yield as consumers. (Even better, today NTUC stopped carrying Asia Pulp & Paper products. Most people buy their groceries from NTUC anyway so this helps a great deal and I’m sure they have felt the pressure from the people to take this concrete step. I hope all companies vet their suppliers and do the similar ethical thing.)


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Trying to Blog using the WordPress App

My blog has become a ghost town of sorts. I know I’ve left it alone and I can almost see the tumble weeds blowing in the desolate space. 

Trying to get the momentum going again. And since I’ve found it easier to blog using my iPhone for my free sites I want to see if it works on this paid site as well. The paid site hosted on GoDaddy has been plagued with technical issues which has put me off writing for a while. Also my focus has gone to other projects. 

Ok here goes nothing….hitting the post button.

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For Anyone Who Has Felt They Don’t Fit In

That’s me all the time. That I don’t fit in or don’t measure up in this world. That no one recognises your value. A value you doubt yourself on a daily basis. Perhaps there’s a planet out there where I do belong, and wonderful like minded folk could join me.  Folks who have been rejected for being true to themselves, true to their values, in spite of the disdain it might bring.

This song by Mindy Gledhill made me tear as it encapsulates how I feel right now. Hope it will make you feel not so alone, not so dejected, if something has brought you down today. If you think you’re weird, maybe it’s a good thing – weird and wonderful. There’s so much more to you than the material world’s classifications.

Besides the compelling lyrics, her voice is just so sweet, magical and soothing.

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9 Thoughts Running Through My Head Right Now

1. I am impatient for perfection

2. I am constantly thinking and pondering

3. I feel immediate relief when I declutter a little  – even if it’s just the tip of the iceberg

4. I am overwhelmed and excited by the millions of things I desire to achieve (see #2)

5. I feel time slipping away and struggle to live in the moment

6. I remember everything – it can be a gift and a burden

7. I feel the blog sucks and I don’t have the ability or enough time to make it as good as I want it to be (see #1)

8. I don’t want to just blog about what I eat, but I won’t stop the food posts

9. I am extremely self conscious

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Tony’s Pizza: Sadly Disappointing

B has been complaining that he has been unable to have a real american style pizza with a dense chewy crust as health conscious folks have made all the crusts so thin and almost biscuit like. I too feel that other than Dominoes, it’s hard to find cheesy doughy pizza of a quality you find in the US or Australia.

I so wanted Tony’s Pizza to be our go to place, but sadly it didn’t live up to expectations (read some rave reviews previously so have been meaning to try this pizza for a long time). The only thing going for it is the size – it’s really huge. To be honest it was all right (healthy and not oily), but just didn’t live up to our expectations, especially considering the higher prices.

The booths seats on the side were super tiny and squeezy though. Definitely not what you would find in the States.

It’s rather hard to find at first, but the restaurant is located at the very front entrance of Bugis Junction – you can spot it from the road.

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Need to Get Inspired Again

My blog has been feeling tired and I have a desire to make it fresh again.  My family members have commented that it’s mostly pictures and less of my thoughts.

I really have been slacking.

Well more a sense of not feeling free.

I have been feeling protective of my thoughts and don’t feel like undergoing the scrutiny and judgement that comes with wholeheartedly expressing what I feel.  This must be why many bloggers have resorted to locked posts with passwords.  Seems a good idea if you want to pour your heart out without limitations.

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Blog Visitors

WordPress Stats gives me some insight that most of my readers are from Singapore followed by the US and than Malaysia. These are stats for slightly more than half a year (2015) since we’ve crossed into July already.

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Durians at Chong Pang City

You can’t help by crave for durian during this bumper crop season. Chong Pang City (Sembawang) is a good place to get durians as cheap as a dollar. We tried the $10 durian called D101 and that was creamy and pretty awesome. Pretty close to Mao Shan although the best durian I’ve tried is Mao Shan which is not in the least watery and just the right density.

To save time just buy the durians without having them cut and the fruit packed for you. If you do this you have to wait at least 30 to 40 minutes in a queue which moves slowly as the people in front have each bought at least 10 durians. But you need the skill to cut the durian and this saves you the trouble. But if you’ve having a durian party and you want to show the kids how it’s actually done, doing it yourself will be a good idea.

We bought 5 and got a discount of $5 ($45 for 5 D101 durians)






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